Strangers became my family members

I don't understand and I do understand people that hate being alone,  I was the same but then my perception of it changed.

I was alone so I started to do things alone. I went to restaurants and bars by myself. I would spend houers and houers at the public library. I would sit at the central station and charge my phone, using the free wifi. It was because I was so alone that I used strangers as my company. I started to go to restaurants and eat by myself with headphones on, often without any music, to listen to the cluster of conversations. Hearing people move, talk, laugh. I come from a home where dinner is an important part and we all eat together, talking, laughing, arguing. So I enjoyed to have all that noise around me. I used them to feel less alone, they were music to me. My music.

I would sit at the library houers on end, walking around the books. See people studying, hear kids play, people talking quietly. It was my living room. And I loved it. People I never seen and will never see again became my family. Every stranger was a new face.

It is also in this period I started watching Dragrace so often I would sit and look at that on my phone in public spaces, eating and giggeling to the people on it. And when I was in the space I sleept in, I would watch it, talking to the air. But it feelt like family, and that is a reason to why I love it even tho it's deeply flaud.

I used to be reckless, playing with my life as it was worthless.

And all these strangers would make me feel a little more like home.